the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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