the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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