i don't like sucking hair
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
