Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
