quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
