Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
