I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
