I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
