Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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