then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
