His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
