I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Randomize
