He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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