Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Randomize
