Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize