There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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