i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
