I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Randomize
