Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
