I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
