If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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