Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Found the puke drawer
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
