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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Never let your siblings swipe right.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
