Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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