Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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