Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
