The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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