If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
