Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
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