4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
He did a backflip because drugs
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize