What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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