the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Randomize
