I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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