After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
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