i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
