I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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