dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
