I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize