I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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