i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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