I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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