omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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