After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
where does the pee come out of this thing
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
