Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Randomize