Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
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