Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize