There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
