despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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