OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize