Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
